Posted 5/22/07

Sports Suck

Dirk Nowitzki will receive the MVP trophy Tuesday in a bittersweet ceremony. The NBA was going to use UPS to ship the trophy, but they said in order to pay tribute to Nowitzki they will use the US Post Office since they can’t deliver when it counts either.

Michael Vick is being accused of being in a dog-fighting ring on property that Vick owns in Virginia.
-Vick said that he is just trying to survive the NFL life. After all, it’s a dog eat dog world.
-Commissioner Gooddell says Vick is on a short leash, and that he wants to take a bite out of crime.
-Vick also said he wants people to stop dogging him.
-The coach said he will try and take Vick’s mind off of everything by working him out through the dog days of summer.
-Vick’s Mom is hopeful her son can change, but she knows you can’t teach an old dog new tricks.
-The owner of the Falcons says that he doesn’t want Vick controlling the organization, and that he refuses to let the tail wag the dog.
-When investigated, Vick told officers they were barking up the wrong tree.
-Vick said he wasn’t worried about being suspended by Commissioner Goodell. After all, his bark is bigger than his bite.
-RB Warrick Dunn says he is getting sick of this media frenzy around this dog and pony show.
-Talking about football, Vick says this is his year to prove everyone he belongs with the quarterback elites in this league. Vick wants his critics to realize every dog has his day.
-Vick’s old high school coach is surprised that Vick even has time to get involved in off the field issues since it is common knowledge that he works like a dog.
-Vick’s Dad wishes everyone would leave his son alone. He says, “It’s better to let sleeping dogs lie”.
-Vick was supposed to be a training camp, but apparently couldn’t make it because he was sick as a dog.
-In conclusion, Michael Vick says, “I just can’t wait for this to be behind be, doggone it”.

Chicago Bears tackle Tank Johnson will meet with Roger Goodell after serving half of his sentence in prison for violating parole. Johnson said dealing with Goodell is like being in prison because he’s all over his ass.

Dale Earnhardt Jr. announced he will quit his current team and drive for someone else next year. The most obvious choice will be for him to drive for the team his Dad drove for and drive using the same number (3) of his late father. Earnhardt Jr. said he is excited for the change, and that just like his Dad nothing can stop him…except for that wall.

The Pittsburg Steelers signed RB Kevan Barlow to a one-year deal. Barlow is expected to complete for a starting spot for the cheerleader squad. The Steelers are now favorites to win the Super Bowl.