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Really Really Big Show Softball Tuesday, June 19 The day was sunny, warm and full of anticipation. After nearly a month of planning and waiting, the first game had finally arrived. The Really Really Big Show was about to take the field for the first time. The afternoon began where the previous evening had left off; Andy and I were finishing up the team uniforms we had just purchased from Meijer. Now, with our red t-shirts, each adorned with black numbers with silver lining, we may not be the best team, but we’ll damn sure be the best looking. Along with the numbers, we decided players should have a nickname placed on the back of their shirts; it just made good sense. So, upon arriving, each player grabbed their shirt, grabbed a marker, and went to town. We began meeting at Andy and Staz’s place around 7:00. Our game didn’t begin until 10:30. That meant there was plenty of time to drink beer and decorate shirts. Oh, and we’d squeeze a little practice in if time permitted. Andy, Staz, Stropes and I were working on our shirts when the girls started showing up. Soon we were joined by Kimmy, our replacement for Ally who couldn’t attend due to having tickets to a concert downtown, Jamie, and Jessica. Kimmy got the royal treatment when she arrived because she really didn’t know anyone on the team. She was an intern with Ally who had expressed interest in being a sub on our team if ever needed… little did she know she’d be filling in on our first night. Jamie had been friends with Andy since college, but she really didn’t know any of the rest of us either. She made a joke about Stropes within minutes of walking in the door though, so she fit right in. Then there was Jessica, whom I’ve worked with for over a year now. She knew Stropes, Staz and Andy from previous RRBS events, and had met Kimmy at the radio station, so no real introductions were needed. Oh, she also made fun of Stropes a few times… initiation complete.
After finishing our shirts, we traveled down the street to a park near Andy’s house to practice. This is where we met Kaitlyn and her friend Mike, who apparently plays on about 17 different softball teams. I was immediately put into a foul mood when I saw Kaitlyn because she was wearing pink, something I had warned her about. She says I only told her she could not have a pink glove. I don’t remember the exact argument, but for the good of the team, I let it go, this time.
When we got there, we got the bad news that we were supposed to play on field #2, the dreaded astro-turf diamond. Mike, through his many years of experience, warned us that this field was a LOT faster, and a lot of people have blown out knees and taken grounders to the face on it. This was not comforting. However, our spirits were soon lifted when we heard “Redwood” chants coming from the bar near the clubhouse nearby to where we were all congregated. It was a group of guys who had seen the movie and recognized Stropes as Joe Redwood. He loved it. Andy, Staz, Kaitlyn and I were not as pleased having not been identified as stars of the film. I happen to think Tommy Bristow was a very underrated character if I do say so myself. But that’s neither here nor there. It was about this time that we got the good news that the game on Field #2 (the dreaded diamond) was going long, so they moved us back to Field three which was made of real grass and dirt. Much better. We were the home team so we had to take the field first. I took over pitching and Kaitlyn was catcher. Stropes was on first base (a life long dream), Kimmy on second, Andy at short and Jamie at third base (a position she knew very well from previous softball leagues). In the outfield we had Jessica in left, Mike in left-center, Kambria in right-center and Staz in right. Things were looking good. That is until the other, much more experienced team jumped out to a big lead. It didn’t help that when I got out to the mound, it was a good 15ft further from the plate than the one I had been practicing on. My first four pitches never even made it to the plate. Kaitlyn had to walk out to get them. After awhile though I got my grove, Kimmy and Kambria made some good plays at first, and we got out of that first inning. Then we were up to bat.
In the dugout, things stayed light. This was really our first chance to get to know some of our new “kids.” I tried to keep things lively by snapping a few pictures, but Kambria wasn’t having any of that, and I kept missing Mike because he was out by first base coaching. I guess as the teams “coach” I probably should have been doing that too. Jessie was getting to know Jamie and Kaitlyn, and Andy and Stropes were in a constant state of “warming up.” I don’t know where Kimmy was, she was hard to keep track of. The game stayed pretty close for most of the game, until they had a massive third inning scoring 12 runs, followed by our fourth inning of a three and out. My arm had turned into a wet noodle, so I was replaced by Andy, then by Mike to finish out the game. We maybe got one more run, but the final score ended up being something like 9 to 18 or something like that. And though we lost, we did it with smiles on our faces and sweet looking shirts on. Well, all except for Mike who didn’t wear his team approved apparel and instead wore a white sleeveless shirt. I think he had another game after ours, so it was okay. At this time, we all gave out hugs, said our goodbyes and went on our merry ways, promising to get together to practice before the next outing. We all knew that wasn’t going to happen. As we left, I was happy in knowing that I surrounded by a great group of people, forgetting that we had just been handed our lunch by a team that should probably have been playing about three leagues higher than us. But that didn’t matter, I was out in the sun, with good friends, getting a little exercise, and had people calling me “Skipper,” which had always been a fantasy of mine. I was hopping that everyone else was having just as good of a time as many of them had played on better (but obviously less fun) teams in the past. Would they all be back the following week… we’d just have to wait and find out. |
Stropes had decided to go with the nickname “Redwood,” which made perfect sense, since he’d been called that for the past two years while working on the movie. Andy went with “Hobag” for obvious reasons, Jess was “Hooker” based on her last name, Kimmy was “The Intern” and Jamie was “Juicy” because one of her students claimed she had a juicy ass. We can neither confirm nor deny the boy’s claim. Staz decided to go with the nickname “The Ringer,” which he believed to be a fitting bit of irony, seeing as how he was the self-described least likely to be called a ringer. I debated for hours on my name, only to end up with one that nobody liked, “Fancy Dan,” which still makes me laugh. When Kambria, Andy’s next door neighbor and collegian softball player, showed up, she picked the name “Shawty” which is some urban way of saying “shorty” which is guess is another urban way of saying “boo.” It’s all too confusing. She made Stropes write the name on her shirt, and he did a fantastic job. We still teased him about it though. Things were going great.
Practice went pretty well for a rag-tag bunch of people who had never played softball together before. Some of us, Kaitlyn, had never even played softball before, period. Everything was going well until for some reason Andy threw a glove at Jessie and it hit her right in the head. That’s when we decided it was time to go to the park and get this game underway.
Our batting wasn’t as bad as I had feared. Andy was usually good for a hit, and Jessica was our walk specialist. Mike and Stropes regularly put it in the outfield, and Kambria, Jamie and Kimmy were sluggers too. That just left the tail end of our lineup, Me, Kaitlyn and Staz, or as I like to call them, outs 1-2 and 3. It’s not that I wasn’t able to hit the ball, I was. It’s just that I couldn’t get it out of the infield. I think every one of my three at-bats got me to first base, but it also usually got Jamie out at second. I have to stop hitting to the second baseman. Kaitlyn who had never swung a bat in regulation play up to this point did about as well as most beginners do, and Staz did about the same. Needless to say the three of us weren’t entirely pleased with our power hitting.
